Boxers or Briefs

June 1, 2007

The purpose of men’s underwear is simple: (1) protect pants from excretions and (2) prevent uncomfortable flopping. Since most teens switch to boxers they are implicitly saying they don’t need (2). I tried switching and found it uncomfortable. Also, my wang would drop down a pant leg and was clearly visible. I opted to stick with briefs. Recently men are switching to boxer briefs, which implies they suddenly want (2). Boxer briefs are just giant briefs, like bicycle shorts, and are to warm in the summer. Obviously, men wear boxers and, now, boxer briefs because they are bowing to fashion. Since I’m immune from such pressures, I considering moving to bikinis because it satisfies (1) and (2) with the least amount of clothing (thongs are ridiculous… a string up your ass doesn’t quite fulfill (1)). Sure I’ll look like a gay porn actor, but I’ll be comfortable. Bikinis are the rational choice for men’s underwear.

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